Letters.....

I was going through some things, trying to get rid of stuff that's been hanging around far too long.... When I ran across a letter I wrote to my mom in July 2000, a little over ten years ago, after she had been gone almost 5 years already. It's hard to believe that in less than 4 months, she will have been gone from here for 15 (yes, FIFTEEN) years! I would like to share the letter here.

Sometimes the memories just come flooding back. We try to fight them to no avail. You haunt our daydreams and our night dreams. We miss you fiercely, yet we must continue on with our lives. We have never let go of the love we hold in our hearts for you.

Days turn into weeks turn into months turn into years. We all experience an indescribable ache deep down in the depths of our souls. How have we come this far without coming unglued? We press on with the day-to-day routines we have shaped into a fine art. When a memory of you comes back, we often fight it because we know the tears aren't far behind. But then we remember how completely and irrevocably you changed our lives just by being a part of them. We let go and we cry till we just can't cry any more.

Letting you go was the hardest thing we have ever had to do. Accepting the fact that you aren't ever coming back to us was the second hardest. The only thing that keeps us from falling apart completely is knowing that the love you had for us lives on within each one of us.

You always said that our faith would get us through times when nothing else could help. We believe you. Our faith in God has carried us through some of the darkest days we have ever known. You instilled that faith in us and we hope that we can do the same with our children.

Mom, you were and still are an inspiration to us. You sacrificed a lot so our needs and our wants could be met. We appreciate that, but most of all we still love & miss you like crazy.

You are always in our hearts!

Love,
Your Girls
(Penny, Amy, & Ginny)

I wrote this letter on 07/06/2000. I don't know that I ever shared it with my sisters. But I do know that they love her and miss her just as much as I do. We were 27, 21, and 16 when she left us, so we've done a whole lot of growing up in the past 15 years......I just hope that she would be proud of the women we have become.